Global Ice Cream Giants Marble Slab Creamery Are Coming to Egypt

Harbingers of happiness and global sweet tooth satiators, Marble Slab Creamery, (Disney adults brace yourselves) is setting up five locations across Egypt. Riddled with snapshots of children grazing on waffle cones and doggos licking the milky remnants off their ice cream cups, Marble Slab’s Instagram calls upon our inner children (with a particularly striking emphasis on the summer vacations spent whining, tantrum-style) for another spoonful of strawberry sorbet. Much like the name suggests, the creamery offers a sort of gimmicky experiential dessert moment that amalgamates everything your little sugar-glazed heart could ever ask for. Let us break it down. Say, for example, your hot girl summer's not hot girl summering and you’re a little heartbroken. Instead of espousing healthy coping mechanisms (because what are those in the face of torment) you grab your car keys, wipe the crunchy mascara bits off your cheeks, and head to Marble Slab. Upon walking in you’ll be met with the soul-healing aroma of freshly baked cones and the insipid realisation that you are, in fact, about to eat your feelings. You begin with the classic vanilla flavour - because so was he - and heaping fistfuls of spongecake. Once you’ve essentially just made a bootleg version of your grandma’s birthday cake recipe, you decide that it’s the perfect time to test if you actually have a strawberry allergy and drizzle an unprecedented amount of the syrupy concoction onto your ice cream order. Satisfied? You’ll sit your pretty little self down in your car and munch your sorrows away while Whitney Houston’s ‘I’m Every Woman’ blares in the background.